C-rappy Cacophony

Tuesday, August 31, 2004

Wondering wer to work?

Just in case,U wer wondering where to work in the semiconductor industry..
Click on the pdf "view abstract" portion of this weblink

Posted by rajesh |

Wednesday, August 25, 2004

Indira 2020 (concluded)


Sriram,who was in his early forties now,was an ambitious man in life when it came to his professional life but was well-considerate and contented when it came to the matter of his personal life.Fifteen years ago in 2004,all he strived was to establish a name for himself in the flourishing software industry and a small happy family under his shadow. When it came to the process of his matrimony,all his expectations from his fiancee was just a down to earth personality with a measured dose of beauty and intelligence.Unlike the other software guys of his age,he was not bothered with the qualification of the girl.

Indira's fatigue on the hot saturday afternoon, had come handy in putting her into a well-deserved sleep,but she couldn't sustain it for long as all her dreams were filled with the dreaded thoughts she had been thinking on the beach.She could not remove the smiling face of Sriram from her minds;the simple 5 foot 5 inches,well dressed,pleasing mannered guy who barely managed to beat her in height when she wore her 2 inch thick high heels.

Just because she had been endowed with the beauty and just because there was a demand for Brahmin girls like her,she had taken the liberty to play around when it was time to pick her husband.Even at the time when she was steadily going on dates with Sriram,she had been busy chatting and responding to allaince requests from other NRI guys,while the poor guy Sriram had completely started devoting his short Indian trip with her.The height of his seriousness was evident from the informal girl-seeing event that he made possible by taking his mom and sister to Indira's house to meet her folks the previous weekend.

Indira woke up with a startled shock as she reminisced the day when she officially broke up with him,leaving him shocked and almost crying at the Cubbon park.The conversations that day had been deliberately coated with acrid remarks from Indira's side as she watched Sriram listen patiently to whatever insinuations and accusations she poured on him.She waited like a hungry hawk to pounce upon its prey as she waited for some controversial issue and started their final conversation..
"So..Sri..U guys from U.S..I heard thers lots of bars/dancing/skimpily clad girls etc?U been to one?"
Sriram innocently smiled as he quipped..
"Yeah..definitely Indu...Thers lots of those..I just went once and that too was to drive back my drunken roommates back home.I seriously hated that culture and vowed never to go back again!"
That was the bait and Indira latched on to it and made a mess of it as she hurriedly left the park,leaving Sriram desperately calling her and trying to explain his innocense.

The reason for Indira's crazy behaviour then, was the dilemma she had been forced into choosing between Sriram and another guy working at Microsoft India - Srinivasan.Her eyes had been temporarily blinded by the tall,dall and handsome features of the other guy.The clincher of his profile was his charming dimple laden face with unique dark Sideburns!
Indira started crying as she realised her foolishness.All that she had been left with now, due to her craze for those sideburns was the side burns on her body -courtesy her psychopathic husband's cigarette butt marks due to his sudden fits of uncontrollable anger when he was drunk and high on drugs!

As Indira looked into her watch,it showed 9 p.m and her answering machine was beeping with 5 messages.Just then she heard Kaats get into the house with the spare keys she had.
Indira wiped her tears off and as she entered the hall,she got the shock of her life ,when she saw Kaats,Kate and Sriram entering the house...
She didn't know what she was speaking as she stammered.."Sorry Kaats..I was so tired and I slept off maa..I am so Sorry maaa...err...Hello sir..hmm....Sriiiiiiiii How are you?"

Kaats ,Kate and Sriram looked dazzled when they realised Indira already knew Sriram as Sriram took hold of the situation "Hello..Indu..What a pleasant surprise!!All the way Kaats was talking about her mom and never in my wildest reams did I think it could be you!!"

As the customary greetings and enquiries got over,Kaats and Kate went to their rooms to tweak Kaat's new robot operated computer!Indira tried to speak normally with Sriram but after a point of time she couldn't take it as she broke down and said.."Sriram..I know this is not the time for it.But I am sorry for everything I did.."

Sriram cut her in between as he said "Please..No Indira..I think it is an irrelevant topic now.I am really happy that we atleast got a chance to be good friends again.There is no scope for any apologies.We have every reason to be happy now and our lives should be dedicated for our Kaatyayanis!See..we both atleast shared the same opinion when it came to choosing our girls' names!
Both of them laughed over it and decided never to talk of the past.

That night,as Indira pulled the bedsheet over her sweet Kaat's tired body,she saw the pure,innocent face of her kid .She felt a sense of great satisfaction and pride as she kissed Kaat's cheeks and fell asleep beside her.That was the best sleep she had had in a long time.

The end!

Posted by rajesh |

Friday, August 20, 2004

Indira 2020...Part 4

Cubbon Park...

Indira drove a few miles on the Mahabalipuram Mahindra city road,when she spotted a young couple speeding on a motorbike overtaking her car.She found the girl on the pillion,with her chin over her boyfriend's shoulder,almost pressing her cheeks against his and hands tightly clasping him,as if to portray that she was ready to go anywhere he took her.That instant almost conveyed that may it even be their death,she was happy to die with him happily.Indira couldn't drive any longer and she stopped at the beach roadside.

A sudden feel of chill went through her spine and her heart started palpitating at a frenetic pace,as she pressed the email button on the dashboard of her car.She glanced through her Gmail account which was nearing its 1 Gb limit and searched for the word 'Sriram'. The infinite number of emails exchanged,the innumerous Orkut chatbox comment email reminders,the egreeting cards etc sprouted open in front of her as she was magically transformed for the next hour to an enchanting era 16 years ago in 2004 at Bangalore.

A young beautiful palghat brahmin girl,in her early twenties,who had just graduated from her B.Sc from RV college of science in Bangalore and was spending her days dabbling between her GNIIT coursework and stitching classes!The cold december mornings,that started very early with her clique of girls singing the 'Thirupaavai' and thiruvambaavai' songs ;the evenings dedicated to the 'Kaatyayani' pooja and the vrata(fast) that she had undertaken to get the choiciest man of her dreams;all started appearing as a cascade of thoughts in front of her eyes.

She got out of her car and strolled towards the sea,as she was confounded by the same kind of distressed feeling she had been experiencing every night before her sleep! She could not remove the image she saw on the portrait-Sriram, from her mind..the young dashing and cheerful software guy from adayar,Chennai,whom she had almost decided to marry..the guy with whom she had spent one of the most memorable phases of her life ,dating for almost daily for a month! Sriram,who worked for Wipro had fallen head over heels when he chanced upon the chubby faced,pleasing looks and graceful smile laden face of Indira on the online matrimonial webpages.He took a monthlong break from his Amex client in Phoenix and flew down to Bangalore to meet her.

As Indira started browsing across the email conversations,the entire phase started to appear as if it was a wellmade movie in flash..

...The mornings when Sriram used to be the only odd man out at the Durga temple filled with girls in half-sarees at Malleshwaram,where he would have assembled at the entrance,wearing his Greensboro leather jacket and Oakley glasses ,just to have a glimpse of newfound goddess of his dreams-Indira!

...The evenings when he used to pursuade her successfully into bunking her GNIIT classes and take her to M.G.Road Pizza Hut.She being the most conservative of all girls of her age from a middle class family,used to be thrilled with all the sudden exposure to the crazy Bangalore outings.

...The funny fashion in which Sriram got introduced to her folks one fine day when they spotted him from their verandah,waiting outside her gate waiting for her to sneak out secretly.It then became a standard 2 minutes of public embarassment every evening,when the whole family used to assemble at the 10th floor verandah to wave at Sriram ,when he came to pick up Indira.

...The way,Indira's dad Ramakrishnan put Sriram in an awkward situation every subsequent visit he made to their house to take Indira out,by shaking his hands and saying "Goodluck".She even remembered Sriram joking about it often to Indira saying.."Am I taking you to Olympics or what?Why does the Oldman have to wish me goodluck when I infact, pathetically steal his daughter out for a date?"

...The way Indira used to avoid any food that whole month,owing to the fast that she had been keeping for Goddess Kaatyayani and the way he had fooled her into eating egg for the first time..the way he made her feel casual when he touched her hand as they crossed the roads.

...The way she herself had started feeling comfortable to put her hands around his shoulder as they asked the traffice policeman on Brigade road to take a snap of theirs.The snaps where she was successful in having her fingers stretching over Sriram's head as if he had horns..

...The evenings when she used to carry her knitting needles and half-finished sweater on her way to the stitching classes,finally ending up at Cubbon park under the Banyan tree,with Sriram being the one who ended up spinning yarns!

...The incident when Sriram shouted out "Mr.Ramakrishnan".."Mr.Chandramouli" like in the movie Mouna Raagam from the 'Barista' Coffee shop glass window ,with Indira ducking her head underneath the table to avoid being spotted by her father and later kiddishly throwing the spoons and fork at Sriram's face,much to the amusement of everyone in the coffee shop.

Indira bounced upon en email which had some lively chat ..
Indira: Sri..what do you expect from me?
Sriram:Indu..Ur smile should being me happiness!Nuthin else Indu..
Indira:Oh..so cute..shows your poetic frame of mind and sharp wit..
Sriram:Hey..I am intelligent but not studious..
Indira:I am neither..:(
Sriram:But you are cute!whatelse matters?

The next mail spoke about her first kiss,which made her even more nostalgic,as she bent her head and started crying silently,only to be disturbed by the Beach patrol cop .She hurriedly left back home and slept like a baby,completely oblivious of Kaats.

To be continued..

Posted by rajesh |

Thursday, August 19, 2004

Indira 2020 -Part 3


It was the day before Kate's birthday and almost the whole class of 8th std F section,was busy discussing various aspects of the birthday party,instigating Kaat's innocent mind to also yearn for some fun.Kate had used the snackbreak to email her powerpoint invitation to the entire class and the next few hours was filled with the 'oooohs and aaahs' from all the kids,as they browsed through the activities planned.

Before sleeping that night,Kaats muttered to her mom..
"Amma..Do you think we should even bother what other people talk abt us and question us?.."
Indira smiled and retorted.."Not at all kannaa!We haven't done anything to belittle ourselves" and Kaats continued.."Yeah..thats why I feel we both should attend Kate's birthday!My friends are actually so cool!They wouldn't even bother about our stories!"

The theme for Kate's birthday was 'The World today' and various debates,ad-mad shows,JAM ,Dumb-C ,laser tag adventure hunt etc were in the offing,followed by a lip-smacking lunch buffet specially ordered from veteran cricketer-Rahul Dravid's restaurant - 'The wall'!Kate and her friends were supposed to come dressed up in costumes as their favorite world leaders.

Soon,the kids with their world leader nametags started to arrive!Kate was dressed in her mini skirts and was U.S Senator Chelsea Clinton dwelling on the international issue of afforestation in Iraq,while her cousin Akash was dressed like the CM of tamilnadu,Rajinikanth,dwelling on his dream project of 'linking rivers',which was about 50% complete!The kids screamed when they found one of their friends dressed as U.S President Arnold Schwarzenegger!Kaats,who was famous for her Indra Gandhi hairstyle,came in a new white Salwar as the Indian PM Priyanka Gandhi.The talk of the day was the special screening of 'Marudhanayagam',that Kamalahassan had finally succeeded to complete after about 10 years of dilly-dallying.

Upon entering the house,Kaats left her mom in one of the huge guest rooms filled with other moms and dads,to be amidst her friends in the garden.Krithi greeted Indira and offered her a glass of wine,which she reluctantly accepted only to leave it untouched till the end.She then asked ..
"Hey Indira..Kaat's dad busy or what?It'd have been great had he come too!I am sorry I din't personally invite U over the fone."
Indira just smiled at her without any reply.

Krithi's husband Sriram was busy at the garden taking care of the birthday cake arrangement that he was not at all seen anywhere near the guestroom gathering.The sprawling 4000 sq foot bungalaw was in itself a great source of attraction for almost 80% of the crowd,who just barely scraped through the monthly bills,with their software jobs and call centre pays!Some of the ladies had even resorted to selling home-made software/Instant java kind of stuff which involved writing software codes for generic applications catering the banking and credit card industry.While Infosys and microsoft charged in the thousands of $s for these,these 'maami-written' codes called "Maamiwares" were readily available with no strings attached for a couple of hundred bucks on cds.

As soon as all the guests began to leave to the garden for the celebrations,Indira's eyes caught sight of the family portrait in the room.A sudden feeling of shock and guilt struck her as she sat down on the Sofa,unable to gain control over her mind and body!She saw Kaats entering the room in search of her as she exclaimed..
"Hey amma..what r you doing here?cmon lets go to the garden.."

Indira took a deep breath and pulled out of nowhere some false reason as she informed Kaats ...
"Kaats..I am sorry maa..remember ..I told you about the important Dell-AMD joint customer service project??I got a call from them and I have to leave immediately to care of it..!
Gimme a call when the party is done..Ok?Say Krithi aunty that I said sorry"She left the place secretly,leaving Kaats to enjoy with her friends.

To be continued..

Posted by rajesh |

Sunday, August 15, 2004

Indira 2020...Part 2

Kaun Banega Sitapathy?

As the road near the Ayyanpan temple started getting crowded with the TATA 'Ratans' and the 'Jamsheds' -the 1 lac cars that had become an instant hit upon introduction in 2008,it signalled the end of an eventful first day at Chettinad Vidhyashram.Being the first day of school,most of the parents had taken 2 hrs off from their software companies/call centres and made sure that they personally picked up their wards from school.

In the sprawling parking area,which was split based on the classes,a lady in her late thirties,clad in a well-pressed cotton Saree patiently waited for her kid,as the school Siren sounded a gentle alarm.She was Indira,the mother of Kaats,who fell on the category of a typical middle class woman,but was different than the other women of her age due to her firm resolve,resoluteness and individualism.She was now a single mother of 2 ,who had managed to break away from the shackles of her despotic husband through a series of legal battles spanning 3 years ,finally endowing her with a divorce and also the custody of one her kids- Kaats.Mrugnayayi,her elder daughter chose to stay with her father at Trichy,bound by the judicial ruling.Indira,who started off her career as a call centre executive at Bangalore had managed to raise through the ranks in the past 15 years that it was fairly a cakewalk for her to get recruited as the Executive Manager of both AMD and Intel's customer service call centres for Europe,which was based at the Mahindra city,built by the late chiefminister JJ.

The 2 Katyayani's emerged holding hands together and Indira could very well see the happiness in the face of her daughter upon her first day at school.
Kaats introduced her new-found friend to her mom with full enthusiam..
"Amma...This is my new friend maa..Guess what is her name..I will give you only 1 guess..?"
Indira smiled at Kate and as she took off Kaat's school bag she said..
"hmm.Let me guess..wait..Is it Indira..my name?"
Kate flashed her close-up smile and exclaimed.."No aunty..I am also Katyayani!",which kind of startled Indira as it was the first time in her life that she had come across someone with that name,other than her daughter!

A BMW suddenly pulled near their car ,as Kate's mom - Kriti,clad in a Jean and Polo T-shirt emerged out of the car and joined the gang in their introductions.As they were leaving,Krithi suddenly called out to Kaats and said..
"Hey Kaats..I am not sure if Kate told you about this.This weekend we are celebrating Kate's birthday at our house.I shall send you the party invitations.You and your parents should attend.Ok?"


It was dinner time and Kaats waited patiently for her mom who had dropped her at home that evening and returned to work.She had fallen asleep on the sofa and was suddenly woken up when the universal remote on her lap started beeping indicating her mom's arrival at the gate and that it was time to switch off the microwave owen in her kitchen.
Indira rushed into the house and quipped...
"Kaats..U asleep so soon?Did Mini call already?" refering to the daily call from her daughter in Trichy.

Life since the past few weeks after their separation, had been reduced to occasional phone calls filled with emotional outbursts from both the sides.Indira ,more than often stayed resolved when she spoke to Mini but could'nt hide her agony and broke down when she heard her kids talk joyously over the phone,forgetting the reality.
Every night she went through the torture of putting herself through the acid test of justifying her actions encompassing various parts of her life.She got used to the habbit of sleeping with more questions left unanswered than what she started off in the first place , some of which traced back even to her childhood...
'Did I do a mistake in opting for commerce grp and not the science grp?'
'Was it my mistake to have been born in a Tambram family?'
'Being naturally pleasing and beautiful..Is that a boon or a bane for a woman?'
'Was I not entirely devoted to my goddess - Katyayani?'
Everytime when it came to the question of her matrimony,that was when she buried her head underneath her pillows,trying to force her into deep sleep!

As they finished their dinner,Kaats ran to their entertainment room to catch a glimpse of her fav reality show "Kaun Banega SitaPathy?",which was the latest show,hosted by Abishek Bachan, rocking India televisions,where 27 males- each from different states in India,competed to win the hands of 1 girl called Sita.

In between the show,during the commercial break,Kaats quickly posed a flurry of questions ...
"Amma..Krithi aunty..invited for Kate's Bday..U remember?Do you think we should go?I really don't want to go..What do you say?"
Before even waiting for her mom's reply she continued..
"If I go there,everybody will ask about daddy and Mini..They will make fun of me..Amma!"

Indira,who was busy working on her Hindu crossword, just nodded and let out a heavy breathed sigh 'hmmm' ,indicating her helplessness in answering the questions..

To be continued..

Posted by rajesh |

Friday, August 13, 2004

Indira 2020

8th std 'F' section

"Katyayani Sreenivasan",the bespectacled physics teacher thundered at the top of her voice and with no response coming from the other side ,she was about to click an 'X' mark on the attendence webpage on her laptop for absence,when a meek voice erupted...
"Yess...che..Present Miss"!
The whole class burst into laughter as if someone had cracked the joke of the century.

It was the first day of class for the year 2020 batch of eighth standard students at the prestigious "Chettinad Vidhyashram" and the teacher patiently took time to correct the poor little girl who had joined their school only that day.
She said.."Katyayani..Don't feel shy.Here at Chettinad,we don't call the teachers as Miss.You need to address us as madam!So,from hereon you should say 'Present Madam'.

Continuing with her exercise of attendence call,the teacher called out the next name in the register,with her tone exhibiting a tinge of bewilderment as she screamed..'Katyayani Shriram'!There was 2 responses of 'Present Madam' this time and one of the responses was from the earlier 'Yess miss' girl who thought the teacher was deliberately calling her name again to check if she responded correctly.

This time the whole class went reeling into uncontrollable laughter with even the strict madam succumbing and joining the 2 minutes of adolescent euphoria.This was followed by all the kids staring at both the Katyayanis and whispering ..
'Hey..2 girlsaa?same nameaa?sooper la??'...
The teacher pressed the buzzer which made a noise akin to banging a wooden duster on the desk and the speaker atop the LCD projector screen behind her, sounded an alarm with a flashing sign "Please maintain silence",bringing the class under control and she asked..
"So,2 girls with such a unique name??Where are you both from and do you 2 know each other?"

With the girls nodding their heads indicating a 'No',Katyayani Shriram spoke in her heavily americanised accent...
"Ma'am,I 'm called Kate by my friends and I'm kinda new to this place.I did my schooling till my 7th grade at Phoenix,Arizona and my dad's come back to settle in India,which made me join Chettinad.Its really amazing to find another girl with the same name,but I don't know her!"

Now,as everyone turned towards the other Katyayani,it kind of shocked the poor little girl,whose mother had just moved from Trichy to Madras for personal reasons.She opened her mouth very reluctantly and said..
"Madam..I studied at R.S.K in Trichy.My mother got transfered to Madras and so I joined Chettinad!"


It was lunch time as the highly sophisticated speaker system played the school jingle and greeted the students..
"Dear students.The time is 12 hrs and 0 minutes.You have a break of forty-five minutes for lunch.Kindly close your laptops and head to the Cafeteria.You have a wonderful lunch.See you at 12.45 p.m for your Biology class"

As all the students headed to the lunch area,the class was filled with the phrases "Today only Upma..cha","My mom made sandwich..cool","Just curd rice dude..It sucks".
As expected both the Katyayanis gathered together for lunch,as one of the self-assumed 8th std romeos remarked.."Birds of the same feather flock together and girls of the same name flock together?huh?" with a dirty smile,which was greeted by a look of nonchalance by the girls.

Upon a full 5 minute silence,Kate opened up the conversation between the 2 ..
"Hey...Kaats...Hope U dont mind me calling U Kaats!whats that you have for lunch?"
Kaats spoke timidly..
"Thats Ok ya!Thats what my amma also calls me....umm..I am eating my usual 'Thayir Saadham'(curd rice) with Uurga!You?"

Kate didn't seem to enjoy her newfound friend's food as she exclaimed.."eeksss..You just eat plain curd rice??Oh my Gawd!I don't like that stuff at all yaa.I ve brot Pasta and Zuchini.Wanna taste?"

Kaats continued..
"No..Thanks yaa..So you have come from America right?How was it out there?Do you find it different here?".
The next 10 minutes Kaats didn't get a chance to open her mouth,as Kate stole the show explaining her highly modern life in the U.S and the troubles she has been forced to put up with,at her current residence,which in itself was a 5 Bedroom Bungalaw worth 2 crores on the Mahindra City Highway.

To be continued..

Posted by rajesh |

Wednesday, August 11, 2004

Hindu crossword 8060

Today germany and quarter seem to have been used quite a lot of times in the
clue.Definitely a different clue setter than the past few days..was
kindaa difficult..
I think only 1 answer remains..

1 Odds point copper tardy to take risks for gains (9) speculates =
e((point = east which gives 'e')+Ps(odds = P's -probabilities)

6 So modern in retrospect was this city of iniquity (5) so+dom(modern returns)

9 To take possession, rent quarter by arrangement (5) enter
rent+e(eastern quarter)

10 Angry blow one does not have to face (5,4) cross wind..cross(angry)

11 Have a game in court? Drama's put down (4,6) play squash

12 Secret connivance made to get money for a patch of ground (4)
plot(double definition)

14 Smoke out revolutionary root (7) CHEROOT ,which is
CHE(revolutionary Che Guevara)+root =cheroot used in cigars..

15 Ministrant has vehicle to take in rest possibly (7) servant ...rest
+ van anagram

17 Those with high values are to meet at quarter, to retire on Sunday
(7) esteems ..SE(SOUTHEAST which is a quarter)+meet+S(unday) anagram

19 Six went to site at Germany for professional inspection (7)

20 Proceeds, to play partly, a Japanese game (4) goes(go is japanese
game ..es??)

22 Ole charcoal burner pushed into an early spot of retirement (7,3)
warming pan = bedwarmer(retirement refers to sleep/bed?)

25 Poor beggar! He's unable to better himself (9) mend+i+can't =mendicant

26 Relieved that each was given quarter at Germany (5) ea+se+d = eased

27 Requirements seen around for daughter (5) needs = seen+d(daughter) anagram

28 Refuses to sanction transposition, so laid low on ship (9)
disallows ..so laid low anagram


1 Get into the arms of Morpheus (5) sleep (phrase..morphine..does it
come from the same root?)
2 He is sociable, but exceptionally green (9) extra+vert(green..as in verdigris)

3 Left in its original state an international body made good (10) un+restored

4 Bill's story (7) ACCOUNT ..double defn

5 Exceptionally self-conscious people (7) egoists

6 Has on direction newly made sliding frame for window (4)
sash..s(direction south)+has anagram

7 An exercise, by repeated practice, doctor has for the sick (5) dr+ill =drill

8 `E admitted improper thought (9) MEDITATED = E ADMITTED ANAGRAM

13 If I get time I'll have to go there! (6,4) PRISON CELL (To do time)

14 Minister those who have been ordained by the human race (9) clergy+man

16 Points at a new appetizer (9) antipasta (points at a) anagram

18 Hospital room facing the ocean (7) sea+ward

19 Matter ejected with violence (7) vomitus

21 Irene turns to him (5) ernie

23 Intersection points in a branching system (5) nodes

24 Light touch a moving billiard ball gives to another (4) kiss

Posted by rajesh |

India..a status check!

I found this article by Arindam Bannerji very interesting.Two parts of this 4 part series have been published on the rediff Money section.I am looking forward to the rest of the series.
It shows the areas where India is lagging/lacking the scientific spirit,but also sends in a dose of inspiration and optimism for the future.
Part 1 :
Can India produce billion-dollar innovations?

Part 2 :
How India can produce big-bang innovations ?

A good question :
Are Indians really dumb?


Posted by rajesh |

Tuesday, August 03, 2004

SOQ..Save Our Quarters...

I promise I would indulge in selfless bouts of charity from hereon.But if you want me do so..Can you please make sure you can do some of these easily doable so-called 'Godly' acts..?

1)The next time you send the excess water from heaven or hell as rain,Can you inform me well before???..so that I can station my car well out in the open to get washed.It would be great if you added some soap to the water and sent it down at high pressure at periodic intervals followed by dustless windflow ,but then I know I would be asking for more.
Jus remember...all this I ask just with the sole purpose of saving and donating that 13 quarters that I would be able to save from the car wash station.

2)The next time I go to the laundry,can you make sure the washing machine doesn't illegally gobble up those extra quarters,that it shouldn't have stolen from me in the first place.All I ask you is to make sure that my 75 cent wash is done at the cost of 75 cents and not at an added cost of 2 more illegal quarters ,which I promise I would donate.

3)Can you make sure the parking meter returns those extra quarters that I deposited?Everytime I park at the downtown,I throw in 5 or 6 quarters for a solid 1 hr parking and when I am done with my work,I find that there is 25 more minutes left,which I won't be needing.I demand an action from you to give me back 25 or 33 cents whatever it is worth,which would go to the homeless man at the next traffic signal.

4)Can you make sure that the local Indian store here doesnt rip me off those quarters with every purchase in their store.Now cmon..How can the smallest pack of the old_almost_expired 'Parle-G' biscuit be worth 3 quarters,when everybody there knows that it used to cost not more than an old_almost_extinct crumpled 5 rupee note in India?If you cut down its cost by even 1 quarter,I promise it would go to the AID/ASHA hundi in that same shop,for the betterment of India.

5)Can you make sure that the phonecard companies don't mercilessly rip me off almost 2 quarters every call I make to India?Can you make the process less cumbersome,without those '6 seconds rounding off' fundae,which they come up as an explanation for cheating me of those few cents every dollar!

6)Can you make sure your greatest of all creations-The Taco Bell,doesnt charge me that extra 50 cents for substituting beef with refried beans on my Chalupa.Even if you are not able to do anything abt it,please send me an email explaining the reasoning behind this cruelty against the desi community as I have cracked my brains trying to do the cost analysis behind killing a cow and cooking it/refrying mashed beans-which one is more expensive??

7)Can you take some online course somewhere and try to come up with an explanation for my telephone bill?I really don't understand the list of charges.What they promised me when I signed up was 29$ and 99 cents monthly charge and when I get the bill,I am appaled to see all the small cents added on the basis of city tax/service charge/surcharge/regulatory fees etc etc.

8)Finally,let me end the way it started..abt my car!There is a saying."water ..water everywhere but not a drop to drink".On the same lines.."air..air..everywhere but never always present in my car-tyres".Why can't you blow in to the tyres often and make sure it stays at the 32 psi always.That will definitely save the 4 quarters which the old-age home would get from me.

So..please Gawd..take some actions soon..Every cent I get cheated,adds to the charity amount that the needy are not getting from me!Remember...few quarters make a dollar!!wow..what a revelation!

Posted by rajesh |


 © C-rappy Cacophony 2005 - Powered by Blogger Templates for Blogger